For me, not for you

Late Saturday, June 15, 2013

Two things happened this week, one today and one yesterday.

Yesterday a friend who blogs said she didn't do it for the fame, she does it because she loves to write. Then this evening someone said that this time with TNG goes by so fast and that I am good with my words so I should document this time of her life with my words. 

I think I have always blogged from the wrong perspective. I have written from the standpoint of what will other people read instead of what is it that I want to say.

I am afraid of offending, of looking stupid, of not being funny enough, or deep enough, or smart enough. But I'm not sure blogging really needs to be about any of those. Clearly if I want fame blogging is not the way I'm going to get it, so I should stop thinking in my head that it's what will happen if I just do it "right" and instead actually just do it.

Even now I can feel myself over thinking "my next post", so I will try in moments like this to talk myself out of it and just write.

I always end these "the future of my blog" posts the same "I will blog every day" and I never do. So all I can say is, I would like to document these early days with TNG in a way that I can use to look back and remember them as she turns 4 and starts school, turns 17 and graduates from high school,  and that's as far as I can think because other than that I will not even imagine what steps lie in store for her, I look forward to her amazing and surprising me at every turn :)

At 5.5 months she's almost crawling and there is so much of this early journey that I could have recounted but for my pride and delusions :)

So I will try to stop writing for anyone other than me and I hope I will thank myself for it later.

With love,

~sarah~